“I just want this to go away”. ” I feel stuck and I don’t know what to do”
How often do we feel this or hear ourselves saying this? In this blog, I am going to introduce the practical tool of oscillation and how this could help us when we find ourselves in that push-pull of really wanting something to be different than it is.
Getting rid of can take many forms. An impulse of pushing or shoving away is a defense response. It is simply our first line of defense. If a poisonous insect lands on me, I want it out of my space. I want to remove the threat. It is appropriate and healthy to push away what is trying to harm me. Our inner experiences are more complex, they may be tied to our beliefs, our memories, our emotions, or our identity.
We’ve probably all tried things like – avoidance, distraction, creating a bigger counter emotion, or a bigger sensation that cuts through and brings us back to the here and now. We may have some somatic tools that help us to down-regulate ( movement, focussing on the breath, connecting with resources)
Really being FREE of something may require a different approach.
Most of us were never taught how to be with something that is hard. We were taught to make it stop. To move on. To fix it. But what if the discomfort isn’t something broken or at fault, What if it is simply an expression of the body – as it is – right now?
Compassionate somatic work can help people find a different way: a way of attention. But, we don’t just ‘notice it’, otherwise it might overcome us or overwhelm us. Instead, we oscillate our attention. This helps us to attend to it in a titrated way ( ie: drop by drop, at a pace that our system can handle). Some folks can give full presence to a sensation for 10 whole minutes, whilst others find that 10 seconds is enough.
This practical technique of oscillation is a recognisable tool in Somatic Experiencing sessions. We practise the practice of moving our attention quite literally from one location to another location within the physical body.
Firstly, Let’s locate the experience that we actually want to get rid of. when we encounter a feeling ( emotion ) or sensation ( felt-sense) that we don’t like, within the body? It might be a strong sensation or physical pain, it might just be a sense of something that is ‘too much’ and we don’t know what to do.
In this practice we take our attention from a place of greater activation ( a pain, a challenging sensation, a big emotion) to a place of less activation ( easier breath, more space, more a benign or pleasant sensation). We move back and forth a few times.
What I like about this invitation to move to and fro, is the choice. We can be here and then there. There is no success or failure in staying with an intense experience. We don’t need to push away or pull towards. We touch it with our attention, sense the edge of it, say hello, know it’s there and then move away to somewhere else – with a different viewpoint, a different flavour.
After moving our attention back and forth a few times, we let go of all ‘technique’. Rest and give space for whatever wants to move – usually this spontaneous movement is what leads to a discharge ( yawn. shake, heat, tremble, a movement of emotion, a bigger breath) We may notice that our original experience has changed in quality or intensity or urgency.
When we oscillate – move our attention back and forth – we are leaning into the rhythmic flow of life, a flow that mirrors our inherent pulse of aliveness.